What Should You Do if Your Spouse Cheats?
If you have found out that your spouse cheated on you, there are a plethora of things to do. The first thing most people want to know is whether or not they should stay in the relationship. This can be a difficult decision and it is best decided after some time has passed. If cheating happens more than once then this may just be what one person wants out of the marriage and divorce might be inevitable. A lot depends on how much anger was felt when cheating happened as well as other factors such as children from the cheating partner’s previous relationships (if any), etc. There are also plenty of free resources, books, podcasts you can turn to, in order to educate yourself on infidelity.
If you do decide to stay, it is important that the cheating partner be very honest with themselves about why they cheated and what they are going to change. Avoiding further cheating is not easy but if one has a plan in place then there may be hope for continued happiness together. This includes meeting up with other couples who have been down this road before or getting professional counseling from someone who specializes in infidelity issues. Couples and individual therapy can be really valuable during this time.
One of the most important things you can do is understand that cheating doesn’t happen because of something wrong with you. Its very easy to have your self esteem damaged from a cheating partner. However, cheating is something that happens because of the brokenness in a person’s heart. The cheating partner may not know how to be honest or find it hard to communicate their needs and feelings.
It can also help to have time away from each other so both partners can think about what they want for themselves as individuals. What is good for one person maybe not good for the other. It takes some work but infidelity has many solutions available with the right tools and willingness on behalf of the cheating partner too make things better again.
It is said up to an estimated 60% of people in long term marriages may cheat, but this doesn’t always have to end in divorce, with counselling determination you can rebuild trust and stay married. Anger and betrayal take time to heal but overall if two people are dedicated to making things work it is possible.
In an ideal relationship before anyone cheats you should be open and honest with each other about areas lacking in your marriage and be able to talk through obstacles and hurdles before anyone cheats. Staying connected, using open honest communication and making time for each other are all great steps for all married couples.