When you’re STUCK in your story

Going through the divorce process is hard financially, emotionally, personally and every other way you can think of. HOWEVER, moving on and embracing your new found freedom (you will!) will be priceless. It’s difficult to reinvent yourself after being in a long term marriage- you go from being a part of a couple to being completely on your own. It is easier for some than others. The most challenging part is moving on, getting UNSTUCK and discontinuing the story you keep repeating to yourself and to anyone who will listen.

Moving on means telling a new story. When you shift your focus and energy to the new life you want to create, the new romance you know is out there waiting for you, you begin to authentically attract what you are seeking and it has nothing to do with match.com, Bumble, Tinder, etc.. Not to say you won’t meet the next love of your life that way but it really can happen organically, anytime and anywhere when you have truly moved on.

We all have our friends we can count on to listen to us complain and commiserate but doing that is staying “stuck in the story.” The longer you talk about your ex, your divorce, visitation issues, child support, the longer you stay stuck. When I was going through my divorce I started keeping a journal, not only for people going through the process but for anyone who was ready to move on and live an authentic, honest “real” life. To be free to be your true self. My book is called, “When You’re Ready.”

Sometimes staying stuck in the story is a way of maintaining a connection with your ex. However, if it’s a healthy relationship it will not be based on “what was”, it will be a new way of dealing with “what is”. The next time you hear yourself complaining flip your thoughts to how you want your next marriage to feel. Manifest, dream, fantasize do whatever it takes. Living this way will do wonders for your health, weight, looks. Think about how a stressed out person looks as opposed to someone who is manifesting a great romance. Try to catch yourself when you hear yourself telling the same story and little by little the story will change and so will your life.

Andrea Gross
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