When you open your closet does it feel like a foreign closet that doesn’t belong to you?
Does the clothing feel so different from who you are now that you want to cry or run?
This is common to women who have gone through a massive change in their life like divorce or separation.
I see it all the time with my private styling clients.
And I’ve been helping women in NYC transform their style and lives since 2001.
When I don’t feel a 100% I ask myself how do I want to feel that day.
Vibrant, cozy, fabulous and/or comfortable.
And then based on my answer to myself I dress to follow that feeling.
I’ve used this tool to super-charge my confidence since grade school.
Often big changes like a divorce will prompt clients to seek me out as the safe person to help them guide them to the next place style wise.
You might want to feel like a different person with a different life and a different partner.
You may still be processing your past and not know what you want yet.
And the problem is you are still living with your past and that past is in the closet.
Big change is a shedding of the skin.
Becoming a new person.
A new person who dresses for self love.
What can you do today to feel a bit lighter?
Pay your style forward!
How do you do that?
Out with the old
In with the new
DETOX YOUR CLOSET
Here’s my foul proof steps to detox successfully in your situation:
Step 1: Define +Decide
-Define: Clarify what looks good on you (which you have already done in the previous chapter.) A personal stylist who is trained in color and shape analysis can help with this step immensely, as we often cannot objectively view ourselves.
Decide: Your criteria for keeping vs tossing
-Are you going to keep or toss things with good memories with your partner?
-Are you going to toss things with bad memories with your partner? (I would suggest yes)
-Are you going to toss any items that feel like ‘old’ you?
PRO Tip: Keep the items that you look 100% great and won’t bring up memories
Step 2: Prep + Plan
-Create a Style Vision Board of what your desired look will be. Do this on pinterest or old school style with poster board, magazines, scissors, and glue. I have a video about how to create a vision board using Pinterest for you here. The vision board will give a reference of your style and look. It’s useful while detoxing and shopping.
Why do this?
-If your desired style on your vision board is mainly filled with classic items and you come across a heavy metal rocker jacket that hasn’t been worn in years, you know it’s not meant for you anymore. It’s time for it to find a new home where it will be worn and cherished. The memories may stop you emotionally, but you can also snap a picture of it and put it on social media to keep it in your heart and mind.
-Get a good friend of stylist to help detox your closet who will be impartial.
-Get supplies like garbage bags labeled with -TOSS, SELL, DONATE, GIFT, REPAIR
-Decide how you will attack your closets? Are you a plodder or a burster? If you can’t do it all in one session break it down and schedule it on your calendar.
Step 3: DETOX
– Remove as much of your closets as possible and place on the bed so that you can sort through items one by one. Try on if needed and refer to your new criteria.
-Make sure to take breaks for snacks and water.
-Music can help make it more fun too.
Step 4: REMOVAL
-Once you have all your items sorted in their respective bags make sure to get them out of your house. Donate to charity. Give to friends and family.
Yes, what you are doing in this step is giving your items which were idle and lonely a chance for a new life with a new owner who will hopefully cherish and use the items and wear them out.
Just make sure to remove them from your house.
You will feel lighter.
I’d like to gift you a copy of my next book with is launching April 6th. Get your complimentary copy here>>http://bit.ly/2nQ40HT
(You might want to pay special attention to the detox chapter.)
Alexandra Suzanne Greenawalt is a Manhattan based personal stylist, author, and speaker. Since 2001 she has been a catalyst for women’s style transformations. Her fashion and photo shoot styling work has been published in Japanese Vogue, The New York Times, InStyle Magazine, Marie Claire Magazine, Surface Magazine, and many more.
Her work can be found at alexandrastylist.com