Where are you in the cycle? Are you thinking about divorce, in the process of divorcing, or is your divorce finalized? Each step has its kick-in-chest, gut-wrenching pain combined with a feeling of liberation as you release the old.
Releasing the old leads to the fear of “now what?” when you have to re-design your life all over again. There are so many justifiable reasons to feel stress in every cell of your body.
With stress, the adrenal glands secrete a hormone called cortisol which adds to weight gain. With the Adrenals on high, insomnia happens. When you do not get your proper sleep, your mood and temperament is negatively impacted. Tossing back-and-forth between mad and sad has everyone on edge especially your heart.
Is this you?
This is where the healing begins. I speak to you as someone who experienced the end of a 16-year relationship. I understand the heartache. But, my time of healing was a very special time. I moved into a small apartment, and it became my “temporary haven.” I had a professional person to talk to in my life who listened to me, guided me, educated me and helped to heal me.
I don’t think I was really ready, but I could no longer stand the level of pain I was in, so I moved forward. Can you relate? It may feel uncomfortable to spill your guts to someone, but your guts have to come out anyway.
Your thoughts, based upon your experiences, have poisoned your body, mind and spirit. You have the toxins spilling around your blood and your brain. It is transforming to speak this venom, have someone truly hear and acknowledge you, and then help you reconstruct healthy thoughts again.
This time in your life, your healing time, is a very sensitive time. Your emotions are raw, and so even the slightest hurt magnifies to intense proportion. I encourage you to be good to yourself in actions and in self-talk.
Treat yourself to a massage, a mani & a peti, go to the movies, sit by a lake, take a yoga class, get involved at church, take long candle-lit baths and start to develop a new relationship… with yourself. Give yourself what you wished you were given in your marriage. Cancel all harming thoughts and replace them with loving thoughts. Believe you deserve it.
So, are you ready to begin the healing process? You are when you are ready to stop hurting so much. When you talk to the right, professional person, he or she will soften your blows, give you a pillow in which to spill your guts, and make it possible for you to get to your recovery. It’s so amazing being here!
I am healed. I am happy. And I want to be proof that it is possible to hope for joy, and have it. You can do this.
Nicole Dennison, CLC, CHC
Certified Life Coach
Certified Holistic Health Coach
Change the Course Coaching